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November 19, 2022

Tamara Falco and Íñigo Onieva: should you eliminate your ex from social networks?

Who more and who less knows the history that is shaking the ‘pink’ news these days. Tamara Falcó and Inigo Onieva They promised each other marriage and the symbols that sealed the good news were a great ring that he gave her and a kiss of love.

The daughter of Isabel Preysler and the late Marquis of Griñón posted the sweet image on his profile of Instagram (with the kiss and the ring, we mean) and posted his premarital happiness. So far, so good and very XXI century.

Capture of Tamara Falcó’s IG

But the leak of an untimely video of him kissing another has wrecked what seemed like a fairy tale. Tamara has deleted the photo of the announcement of her engagement from Instagram and they have stopped being friends in that social network, once a channel of exposure of their love story.

The reaction of her, however, has gone further and since the labels that linked them no longer appear, everything indicates that directly You have blocked him. He is not the first person or the last who, in the face of a sentimental breakup, puts his feet in dust at all levels, physical and virtual. Is it convenient to do so?

Putting ‘virtual ground’ in between

The psychologist Gabriela Paoli, author of the book ‘Digital Health’, has few doubts about it: “Deleting your ex or blocking him I consider healthy and very convenient.” Paoli argues that it is of little use to put land in between while keeping other channels of communication open, such as those related to interaction by social networks.

“If you don’t, you’re in their day-to-day life and see if the other is with their friends, if they like a girl, if they write a comment to them. None of this is going to help you and it will probably be a source of a lot of discomfort.” So much so, that he recommends breaking contact completely with the ex-partner, in order to Cooling that link and to be able to focus on getting ahead. “If not, that process is contaminated,” he says.

Most likely, he continues, is that we do not fit well the information we see of the other in social networks and hurt us. “Therefore, if there is any type of communication with that person to close issues or clarify something, I recommend that it be Direct, honest and face-to-face“, says the psychologist.

However, he recognizes that it is a brave decision that can cost, because it means cutting many ties, but it is a lesser evil: “You can throw yourself all day Ruminating what he does And what it doesn’t do and that can also be very painful.”

So the recipe, which we do not know if Tamara Falcó has followed her to the letter, is: “I recommend managing this situation with height, Education and respect, so you can inform the other person that you are going to delete it to make the break healthier and more practical. It’s a perfect way to tell your ex that you’ve decided to go your own way,” concludes Paoli.

3 to 6 months of zero contact

Elsa Debra, a coach specialized in women, puts a minimum in that emotional firewall necessary to go through the grief of a breakup: “The optimal is 3 to 6 months of zero contact with the other person to not be Attentive to your movements. You don’t even have to see each other to return any belongings. It’s better to use a courier service than then spend the whole afternoon crying,” he says.

Debra explains that sometimes we don’t cut the thread in networks because (in the case of taking the initiative) we feel guilty about breaking. But he insists: “If it hurts you to talk to your ex, you should delete or block him from your networks. If you are absolutely not affected by anything, then you can keep it.”

But why should you be so radical? The coach does not hesitate either: “You can fall into the temptation to return. And if nothing has changed, the same thing will happen again.” In other words, it’s a step backwards. “It’s better to keep the decision firmly and focus on yourself. Besides, he can See you with another and complain publicly, or vice versa, and thus the wounds are reactivated,” he says.

Keeping in touch, something good will have…

Shutterstock

Psychologist Rosa Armas, from Psychologist at Home, cites a study by Tara C. Marshall, from Brunel University of London, who agrees on the obstacle posed by networks to recover from a breakup. However, not everything is counterproductive if one maintains that virtual thread. So, these are son the Advantages detailing:

  • It can help accept that the relationship will not return. In addition, the increasing attraction that we sometimes feel in the face of the inaccessible is avoided.
  • If you block your ex, you may distance yourself from mutual friends.
  • If you know where it goes through its networks, you can dodge you so as not to match, if you wish.
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